It was nearing
our last few days and I had become very familiar with the typical outreach
routine. Although I was familiar with what the routine generally looked like, I
was never certain exactly how it would go. This particular day we headed out to
the point where a lot of the street kids were. (The ones that either lived on
the street, or lived with family, but were not well taken care of because it
was the poorest area of the city)
As we headed out
to do a feeding at the point this day, I specifically recall every detail in
one of the biggest smiles I have ever seen. This little boy named Juanelle came
running at me in full sprint! I could see him from far away running to tackle
me! His face was light up with laughter and joy and such excitement that he
could hardly run fast enough to get to me! His attention was on nothing else,
but getting to me! As soon as our eyes locked I swam through kids to make my
way to him. The explosive joy and love that radiated from him sent my heart
ablaze with love and excitement to embrace him!
Once he got
close enough he launched up towards my arms certain that I would catch him! So
fearless I thought! What if I didn’t get
my hands free from other kids in time to catch him? Being the adorable
fearless kid he was, not catching him was not an option! And from the grip he
possessed I could tell that didn’t matter anyway because he had made the
decision to latch on with all his might, weather I was ready or not. Holding
him I hardly even needed to use my hands! He was snuggled in tight and right
where I wanted him to be regardless of my efforts.
He was beaming
with joy for quite some time playing with my hair, giggling, and basically
climbing all over me. I loved having him enjoy being held by me so much. I had
so much love for this child I hardly even knew.
After some time
of laughter he seamed to get tired. Within seconds of me noticing his fatigue
he nuzzled his head into my neck and shoulder and found all the warmth and
peace he needed to fall asleep. MY HEART MELTED!!!! It was so precious! There
he was in 100 degree weather, with other kids still jumping all around me and
the group, much commotion about where we were going and what we were doing and
there he was in perfect peace, asleep in my arms.
God so clearly
spoke to me in this moment. He showed me that this is how He wants to treat me.
He wants to hold me, comfort me, love me and protect me. He wanted to show me
that with Him as my shepherd I lack nothing. He showed me that He wants me to
trust Him, He wants me to be all in withholding nothing and to allow him to
hold me and love me. Even in the midst of chaos his perfect love cast out all
fear and in Him I find my peace and rest. His word for me was this passage;
“The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads
me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my
soul.
He guides me along the right paths
for his name’s
sake. Even though I walk
through the darkest
valley,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.”
The part that really stood out
was, “even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for
you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” This boys life felt
to me like the darkest valley… such little food, water, shelter, comfort,
safety, protection, love… Did he have any of these things? I think there were
many days it was questionable if he would get food, or water and that is just
physical needs! I know his spiritual needs were severely lacking as well. To me
this seemed like the darkest valley one could walk, yet in my arms he found
rest for his soul. He trusted me and did not fear any evil that would come
because he knew I would look out for him, comfort him and protect him. He knew
he was in the safest most loving place he could be… in my arms.
